Let It Go (and no, this is not a Frozen endorsement)

This picture of Lake Michigan always calms me down and makes me happier. Some times when I’m frustrated, I will just picture myself sitting on lakeshore, listening to the water, and it brings me to a happier place where I can gather my thoughts and relax. (Photo: Me)

For the last 8-9 months, almost every day at work was a struggle for me. I could always count on SOMETHING or SOMEONE to set me off. Maybe it was a co-worker, or even worse a boss, that said something that just irked me. Maybe something I was working on just went “completely wrong“, throwing me a curve ball and then ruining the rest of my day. There would always be something that happened during the work day that would make me upset and unmotivated, resulting in me going home in the evening and taking it out on literally the only person that I actually liked to see during the day. A few weeks ago, I had one of these experiences during work and wrote about it in my daily journal. However, instead of complaining about the incident at work, I found myself writing about how to solve this problem that I’ve been having at work. Here is what I jotted down:

Do not let petty people or things bother you.

-Getting upset over something small (though some people may make it seem very big) is a waste of emotions and energy.

-When something happens or someone says something, think: Does this really matter in the long run? Is there a larger impact from this “big thing”? You will find that most of the time, the answer is “no“.

-Do not let others control your emotions. When this occurs, that person controls many other aspects of your life.

Now, I know that this is just part of the solution to this particular problem, but I think that this mindset helps find the remainder of the solution. Thinking this way has allowed me to remain more calm in situations that normally would have upset me. It makes me think about how I am the one that should have control over my emotions, not someone else. When I have control over my emotions, I feel in control over my life. When someone else can make me furious, depressed, happy, excited, embarrassed, etc. this is when there is a problem. Many people when angry, yell, curse, and say things that they either don’t mean or wouldn’t have said if it was not for the event that made them angry. Most of the time, people regret what they say during these emotional times. Maybe you say something you don’t really mean to your boss, and it costs you your job. Maybe you scream and curse at your significant other because you’re in a bad mood from work, and it costs you your relationship. Emotions have a significant impact on our lives, so taking a minute to feel out how we should and will react is important.

I haven’t perfected this practice yet. I still have moments at work where I will snap at a co-worker when they try to pawn off work on me. I still struggle with taking a minute to think, “Does this really matter in the long run?”. However, I already feel like my mindset and outlook on work, and on life, has improved since trying this. I feel more relaxed at work, at home, and in my own mind.

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